Broken Believer

Never have I heard the still small voice so audible and unmistakable.
Never have I felt every decibel of sound stronger, every scold to reproach louder and every whisper of love softer.
Man! the prayers stem from a deeper trench in your heart when you’re broken.
In a passing minute, you’re speaking well accented English or whatever dialect you’re most familiar with.
In the next ensuing minute, you’ve gone beyond the parlance of man
You find that there’s been a transition to a heavenly tongue so powerful literal walls quake as you are doused in what feels like a spiritual geyser.
An experience so similar to that of Silas and Peter in the prison cell as told in the pages of the Book of Acts.
Unleashed is the aura of the Messiah.
To express in words, it feels like a supercell breaking loose in the heart of a searching pariah, a castaway from the gates of hell who happens to have encountered Him.

You know otherwise. Oh! You know otherwise
They religiously remain none the wiser, steeped in ignorance and refusing to see the truth. Unwilling to avail themselves to heed to the call,
No matter how long you try to make them understand.
Brokenness can only be understood experientially.

In the broken state, melodies from the throne room gape at your soul, thrashing to and fro like the waves of the sea, rising to a holy crescendo.
You feel a searing of its immaculate power; the desired sanctity forever anew whenever experienced.
Loosened bonds and unshackled chains, a testimony of the present
The feeling of an unbridled yearning to live in His presence waxes greatly.
An unmatched wanderlust to flee from self, to die to self.
A daily reminder to keep him near to you.

Man! The Holy Spirit is so chatty when you are broken.
For the introverted, he’s that friend looking to break you out of your reticent shell.
To the extroverted,  he equals and subdues your gregarious nature to keep you afloat amidst the noisy torment.
The perfect arbiter regardless of the disposition particularly when you’re broken.
He sees through all the ploys when you’re broken,
Dependable and especially protective when you’re broken.
In your brokenness, he lits your soul afire fanning it till it becomes unquenchable.
There exists no friend so admirable and every conversation held in this state remains so incredible.
Alas, there’s a profound state that is very reachable.
Letting him lead is the only way. Just relinquish the reins of your life. Follow the lodestar of Christ to a place more beautiful than the life formerly known to you.

My heartfelt prayer off-late has been intentionally repetitive.
Every morning, noon and night on bended knees, a resounding

“Keep me broken for you
Long may I remain broken.
Drowning deeper in you as I stay broken.
Wide-eyed and mystified in your glory while I am broken
Who I am is a broken believer, broken for you, just for you”

rings out to my soul hearkening for it to reflect these very words I recite daily.